About That Kiss
by LittleLizzieZentara
Summary: Castle complained in the season 3 finale that he and Beckett had kissed but never talked about it. What if they HAD talked about it? Set approximately ten hours after the last Caskett scene of 'Knockdown' (3x13). Potential spoilers through season 3, potential vague spoilers for all aired episodes.


**The original title for this had been 'They Kiss And They Talk About It.' Inspired by Castle's complaint in the season 3 finale that they kissed and never talked about it. Fair warning, there won't be much talking in the 'They Kiss' part.**

 **I really wanted to get this written in time for the season finale. It wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for my amazing mother (since I'm a weekend writer and I'm writing this on Sunday, Mother's Day) who said to me, 'You've done a lot for me lately. Spend the rest of the day doing what you want to do." Do I have an amazing mom or what?**

 **Disclaimer: If I owned it, I wouldn't have spent the last few weeks on pins and needles waiting to find out if there would be a season 8. I LOVE that we found out on the 3** **rd** **anniversary of 'Always.' I wonder if that was on purpose….?**

 **Probably not, since they revealed all of the shows on ABC on that day. But Castle fans can all get a kick out of it**

* * *

Dumb idea.

She had said DUMB idea.

Apparently since his original dumb idea hadn't worked, he decided to move on to a terrible idea. One that could only end in disaster.

But she was stuck. She was flat out of ideas, dumb, terrible or otherwise.

Not to mention the fact that if she blew their cover now in a matter of seconds they could all be dead.

Instinct had led her to reach for her gun.

The shock of his touch more than the strength of his grip stopped her.

Her eyes locked with his, all she could do was wait as he slowly leaned forward.

His lips were soft, warm despite the coldness of the January night. Kate wanted to yank herself out of his hold while at the same time she could barely fight off the need to press closer. Castle would let her go, she knew, but then their cover would be blown and the lives of Ryan and Esposito would be forfeit.

She just had to tough it out. It couldn't last forever. She was strong. Fighting her feelings for Castle, physical and otherwise, was instinctual. Had been for months.

But when he rested a hand lightly against her back, she had no choice. It was a small thing. She could hardly even feel it.

Only…

It made her want to touch him back. Pull him closer. Feel the strength in his shoulders beneath her palms. The hardness of his chest against her own. Tangle herself up in him. Make it impossible for him to get away from her.

Her hands rose to do exactly that but with self-control that surprised even her, Kate's fingers fluttered for a brief moment against his waist as she forced herself to break the kiss.

The longing she saw in his gaze was too much. Not only did it match the need pulsing through her, it showed her clearly how deep his feelings actually ran. She knew, with that innate ability that allowed them to be so in sync when working on cases, that the longing wasn't purely physical.

She couldn't do it. If she looked into his eyes much longer she might blurt out the truth that she had tried so hard to keep hidden. Even from herself.

She was in love with him.

Had been slowly falling since his heartfelt apology for looking into her mother's case after she had expressly asked him not to. Feelings that she fought to stamp out over the summer. Except she knew before she was done interrogating him hours after seeing him for the first time in months that she had completely failed in her attempt to push him out of her heart.

There was only one thing left to do. With a quick glance at the guard who was the whole reason for the ruse in the first place, Kate leaned forward, bracing herself for impact.

As soon as Castle's lips were once again pressed against hers, Kate realized it hadn't worked. There was no preparing herself for a kiss like this.

She gave in to the need to touch him, her hands gripping his shoulders, her fingers curled, relishing in his strength.

Kate scrambled for control, refusing to let go when he started to pull away.

 _She_ would choose when to end the kiss.

And she wasn't ready yet.

Because of the guard.

Yeah.

The guard.

He had to be convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that she and Castle were nothing more than a couple who had a bit too much to drink, drunk enough to not care that someone was watching them give in to their desire.

Kate looked out of the corner of her eye and saw that the other man was still walking towards them, carefully watching their every move.

She tried to think of a way to let Castle know they needed to step it up a notch but something must have clued him in because suddenly they were doing more than merely brushing lips. From one moment to the next, his tongue was in her mouth, tangling with hers. Then his teeth sunk down on her bottom lip, at the corner where she would bite her lip to tease a reaction out of him. Except this time the reaction was hers. A small moan escaped before she could stop it.

Embarrassment made Kate want to pull away, but she couldn't chance it.

Until she heard the mocking laugh from the guard, the sound that let her know Castle's idea had worked.

Not wanting to waste another second-or run the risk of needing to kiss Castle for a third time-Kate wrenched her right hand from under Castle's left, her gun tightly in her grasp. In a move that the guard never saw coming, Kate slammed the gun against the back of his head.

She watched the man drop to the ground with a grunt, followed by a heavy thudding sound as his body hit the concrete.

"That was amazing," Castle's awed voice sounded from behind her.

Slowly Kate turned around. He wasn't going to want to _talk_ about it, was he?

It was all Kate could do not to roll her eyes at herself. It was _Castle_. He liked to talk about _everything_.

"The-the way you knocked him out, I mean," Castle clarified, obviously fumbling for an explanation. "That was-"

"Yeah," Kate said, knowing it wasn't at all what he was referring to but relieved that was the story he was going with. Now that the guard was out of the way, they needed to focus on rescuing Ryan and Esposito. Coherent thought still somewhat of a struggle, all Kate said was, "Let's go," and took off in the direction she knew Lockwood was holding the rest of her team, knowing that Castle would be right on her heels.

* * *

"Castle, can we talk for a second?"

Kate hadn't meant to sound so nervous. There was nothing to be nervous about.

Absolutely nothing.

Castle hadn't mentioned the kiss at all, even after Ryan and Esposito were safe and Kate was with him in the back of the ambulance, helping him re-wrap the bandage on his hand.

The hand that had gotten bloody and bruised from jumping on to a professional sniper and knocking the man out cold.

Kate still couldn't believe he had done that.

But that wasn't the point.

What she needed to focus on was the kiss.

Well, not the kiss itself but Castle's reaction to the kiss. Almost twelve hours had passed since she had knocked out the guard. Twelve hours in which Castle had plenty of time to let his writer's imagination weave dozens of stories surrounding the kiss and what it might mean.

Kate needed to make sure the story he settled on was the right one.

The one that didn't force Kate to confront the emotions that had been brought to startling clarity in those few brief seconds. Not just her emotions, but his.

The status quo was working for Kate and she wanted to hold on to it for a little longer. Or maybe a lot longer. However long it took for her to gather up the courage to just…dive in.

Which wouldn't be happening today.

Or tomorrow.

Or next week.

Maybe not even within the next year.

Kate couldn't quite hold back a slight grimace at the thought. Waiting a whole year to kiss Castle again wasn't something she could dwell on at the moment.

"Beckett, are you okay?" Castle asked, his forehead creased with worry.

She should have known Castle would notice. The man watched her far too closely for her peace of mind, except for those times when she really wished he would get what she _wasn't_ saying, like when she had tried to tell him she'd wanted to go to the Hamptons with him the previous Memorial Day weekend, less than a minute before ex-wife number two showed up.

"I'm fine, Castle," Kate said, her nervousness making her tone more harsh than she meant it to be. "Just…." Not wanting to deal with this in the hallway where anyone could overhear, Kate glanced in the direction of his office which really wasn't visible from where she stood out in the hall, "Can we talk?"

"Yeah, of course," Castle said, stepping aside so Kate could enter the loft.

Once Castle had assured her that both his mother and daughter weren't home at the moment, Kate began.

Or tried to.

"So, ummm…." Unfortunately words weren't Kate's strong suit, but she wasn't sure what actions would work to give Castle the impression she wanted to convey, so she had no choice but to muddle through, "I wanted to make sure that I didn't give you the wrong idea. With those kisses, I mean."

The shock on Castle's face, his wide eyes and his jaw dropped the slightest bit, would have been amusing if the situation hadn't been so serious.

"You know Josh and I broke up last week and I just didn't want you to think…."

"Think what, Kate?"

Uh oh. He'd called her Kate. That wasn't a good sign.

"That…" What was that look in his eyes? If she didn't know any better, if it was anyone but Castle, she would think…No, it was Castle. She had to be wrong. He wasn't the type to…. "That…"

Castle took one step closer. Then another. The glint in his eyes grew brighter, deeper somehow.

Okay. This was ridiculous. This was Castle and he did not get the upper hand.

Not with her.

Not ever.

"I just didn't want you to think it meant anything," Kate said in her most confident 'Detective Beckett' tone.

"Oh, it meant something," Castle said, moving still closer. "It definitely…" Another step. "Definitely..." Another step and the distance between them shrunk to mere inches, "Meant something."

"Castle." Kate put out a warning hand, her fingers lightly touching his chest before she abruptly lowered her arm. Touching Castle was _not_ a good idea right now.

Castle suddenly took a step back and gave her his most laid back grin, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "It means me we were able to rescue Ryan and Esposito."

Kate sagged in relief. Teasing Castle she could handle. Their teasing banter was as much a part of their friendship as the coffee he brought her every day.

"Had you there for a moment, didn't I?" Castle asked gleefully.

"Yeah, you got me, Castle," Kate said drily.

"Beckett, you know me. I never would have done something like that if we had been able to think of any other solution. And you've made it perfectly clear that-"

Suddenly he stopped. His expression reminded her of when he was mulling over a theory for a case.

"What, Castle?"

"You know me," Castle said slowly. "You know I would never hold anything done undercover against you. So why would you…."

He studied her as if she had suddenly become a mystery he was trying to solve.

"You're worried," he mused aloud. "Worried that I would get the wrong impression. Worried enough that you show up here almost an hour before you head to the precinct."

Kate didn't like the direction Castle's thoughts were taking him. She had to throw him off the scent.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

Kate knew what he was asking but she needed to buy time. Time to come up with an answer that would satisfy his curious mind and distract him from the theory that Kate knew was way too close to the truth.

"Why would you, Detective Beckett, be worried enough to come here to make sure I didn't get the 'wrong impression?'"

"Because I _do_ know you Castle. You've come up with dozens of theories that have nothing to do with the actual truth."

"You have to admit, many of those theories have led to the truth."

"I'll admit," Kate conceded, "that there have been times when your theories have led, in an extremely round-about way, to the truth."

"Like this one?"

"Oh please," Kate scoffed. She threw in an eye roll, something she hadn't done as much lately but had been a common response during their first year of working together.

Kate watched as Castle processed Kate's reaction, hoping it was enough.

She was running out of excuses. Explanations.

She was running out of words.

She was on the verge of resorting to actions. The problem was, she didn't know what those actions should, or even worse _would_ , be.

"Prove it."

"Prove what?"

"If those kisses-and yes, there were definitely two, Detective, the second one instigated by you, I might add-were only part of working undercover to save Ryan and Esposito, prove it."

Kate's brow furrowed in confusion. "Prove it _how_?"

"A third kiss."

" _WHAT?_ " Kate realized, too late, that she should never have started down this road. Talking to Castle about it had been a bad idea. Better to have just pretended it never happened.

Too late for that now.

"Castle, I am _not_ going to kiss you again. That was a one time," he raised a brow and she amended, 'okay, two time thing. It never would have happened if we weren't working a case and trying to save our friends."

"True, it never would have happened otherwise," Castle agreed. "But it _did_ happen. And if it didn't affect you, if it didn't mean anything, a third kiss shouldn't make any difference."

"But it would make a difference to you, Castle," Kate tried, knowing she was grasping at straws but desperate enough to try. "You tried to get me into bed after our first case. I would just be leading you on if…"

"I think you 'doth protest too much'," Castle said in a paraphrase of a popular Shakespearean quote. "Tell you what. I'll count to five. If you leave in the next five seconds, I'll agree that the _kisses_ didn't mean anything to you. If not…"

Deciding the first choice was the best course of action, Kate backed up a couple steps towards the door. "If not, what, Castle?"

"Then I'll kiss you," Castle said, confirming her suspicions. "And I won't hold back this time."

 _This_ time?

He had been holding back last time? Even with that second kiss?

Heat flared. Immediately afterwards, fear and self-preservation kicked in.

If she wanted to have any chance of keeping her heart safe from Castle's clutches, she needed to leave.

Now.

"One."

Kate started hurrying towards the door. The only problem was she was watching Castle rather than where she was going. She stumbled over something on the floor; she didn't bother to glance down to see what it was. Castle's quick reflexes kept her from tumbling to the floor.

Except now he had one of her wrists in his grasp.

"Two," he said as he released her.

Kate decided to try, one last time to reason with him. "Castle," was all she could get out because even she could tell how pleading and needy she sounded.

Kate Beckett didn't do pleading.

And she sure didn't do needy.

"Three."

Okay, enough stalling.

Stalling? Is _that_ what she was doing?

That couldn't be it. She hadn't had enough time to contemplate all of the ramifications of diving into a relationship with Richard Castle. There was so much to consider. His past, his fame. His daughter and mother; what would they think?

"Four."

Kate glanced over at the door. She could make it if she ran.

Except actually, physically running from a kiss that she claimed didn't mean anything would give him just as much proof that she was lying as an actual kiss would.

"Five."

 _Why_ hadn't she told him to count to t-

He wasn't kidding when he said he wouldn't hold back this time. His hands were on her hips, pulling her towards him with a swift motion that caused her body to align perfectly with his. His lips descended on hers without the slightest bit of hesitation. As his arms slid around her he lightly bit her bottom lip, causing her to gasp, parting her lips just enough for him to take advantage of the unintended invitation. By the time the tip of his tongue touched the roof of her mouth, his arms had settled around her waist, holding her securely against him. Once his tongue started tangling with hers, Kate knew she couldn't fight it anymore.

But she was Kate Beckett. And she was no passive partner, especially not in this.

If she was going to be brought to her knees, so was he.

Hooking her right leg against his right hip, Kate pressed even closer to him as she finally started kissing him back. Her hands quickly unbuttoned his shirt and her fingers eagerly explored his bare chest.

He was more muscular than she realized. He certainly wasn't a bodybuilder, but that kind of man had never appealed to her, anyway. Castle was just right.

Perfect.

For her, anyway. Which was all that really mattered.

Castle abruptly tore his mouth from hers, stepping back, causing Kate to pitch forward since her leg was still wrapped around his hip.

"Castle, what-?"

Speaking between gasping breaths, Castle warned, "Kate, if you don't want this, tell me now. Or if you're not ready-"

If Kate had needed any further proof that Castle was the right one for her, she now had it. What other man would stop in the midst of such a heavy make-out session that was rapidly heading towards more, all to make sure that she was on board with it? Especially considering her passionate response?

Only Castle.

"Castle," Kate's breathing was just as choppy as Castle's, "I'm ready. I want this. I want all of it. I want to be there for you and have you be there for me and just dive into it together. I want _you_."

"Just checking."

Kate may have expected more of a reaction than that but as Castle drew her back into his arms and lowered his mouth back to hers, Kate decided that, for now, that was all the answer she needed.

* * *

 **In case anyone is wondering, this is THE END. There will not be another chapter to this. 1) Because I have too many other ideas I want to write, 2) because I already have two other stories I need to finish, 3) my muse is done with this story, and` 4) there is too much time between updates when I post a story before it's completed and I REALLY want to stop doing that.**

 **But if anyone wants to write their own version of what happens next, feel free. Just PM me so I can read it. :)**

 **Happy Castle Monday!**


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